The social media has been on fire in the past few weeks concerning rape allegations against Pastor Biodun Fatoyinbo, after interview granted by Busola Dakolo. Timi Dakolo is Busola’s husband.
Since KHC is in that space, I see the need to make a few comments. I am not here to score some cheap points or accuse anybody. That is not my business. Thankfully, I am not an investigative journalist neither am I a criminal investigator.
Secondly, I am not here to judge. I am not there when anything happened. I don’t know whether it is true or not, but as in every situation, there are things to learn.
It is important to set forth the truth of God’s word as is it is the only truth that can set free. KHC has over 14k members and I see the need to say a word or two to our members.
I have also waited a while to allow my instructors and elders in the body of Christ to speak first.
Let me begin by saying, rape and all other forms of sexual abuse is not something one can just glean over. It is deep, the wounds are real and the mental bondage and torture can be debilitating at its minimal level. Hence my deep sympathy to all who have been victims of rape at one point or the other.
So quickly, I will like to to speak to the following groups.
1. The Victims
a. Concerning victims of rape, I have had to deal and counsel a few. The depression, suicidal thoughts, several nights of staring into space, crying endlessly and all other painful experiences are not anything you wish for your daughter or sister. Hence, my deep sympathy to all who have been found in such scenarios, God who can heal and restore will visit with you in Jesus name.
b. You need to heal. Yes, it will take a while, but you can be healed. If you say a victim of rape is traumatized, you are right. If you say she is “finished” you are wrong. God can heal. The deed is done. There is provision for healing and restoration.
c. Seek help with the right people. Don’t give up, don’t become suicidal, let the healing power of God touch you and you will be amazed that God will turn it all for your good.
d. As hard as this may sound, you will need to forgive! Forgiveness is the beginning of healing and restoration. There are two people to forgive. The rapist, and then yourself.
e. Don’t blame yourself. Don’t let your life stop. You were not wrong. You might have been careless, naive and unsuspecting, yes, we all make mistakes. Rise from the doldrums of yesteryear and move into the future.
f. The goal of the devil is for you to blame God. Never do that. Never forsake your mercy. Hold on to God tightly and His word. You will be healed. Your future will be glorious. Your marriage will be beautiful. Job’s wife said “Curse God and die!” That is what happens when you blame and curse God; death! That is not your portion!
f. In the scriptures, Rahab was a professional prostitute. And you are not. But she found God and her name was etched along in history in the faith hall of fame. How did she ever get there? She met God. Never lose God irrespective of the abuse. Stay close. God will make all things beautiful.
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a. Do not turn the pulpit into a social media arena. Teach the word of God.
b. Do not mention names on the pulpit. You are not an accuser of the brethren.
c. Set forth the truth of God’s word as regards adultery, sexual perversions, rape and so on, without having to mention any names. This is very important. Your people are there with their issues to get blessed, not to further trap them by opening the door to wrong spirits.
d. Examine your own life. You may not be a rapist, but what is that “sin” that doth so easily beset you as well? They all have same destination, and that is hell.
e. Habitual lifestyle of sin, whatever sin, rape, lust, mismanaging of church finance, and so many other things, puts you at risk, anointing or no anointing.
f. The miracles are never a validation of your indulgences. Judge yourself. Be brutal with yourself. That road is narrow.
g. Have the fear of God. He said you are fishers of men, He never asked you to fry the fish and dine on them!
h. Every single soul that comes your way, you will give account. That should scare you a little. You are never to take advantage of the little ones. What Jesus said about those who do that is not nice. Stone hung on the neck, then thrown into the sea. Matthew 18:6
i. To all, presidents of fellowships, excos in schools, Papas and Uncles in NCCF and so on, what are you doing with those under your influences? Are you aware you will face God one day over this people?
j. That you are sinning anonymously does not keep you in a “safe” zone. In fact, it puts you more on a dangerous pedestal. You will be judged. And it will be brutal.
k. Rather than feel superior and having some messianic syndrome, let’s pray for the victims and for Pastor Biodun. Prayer is key. Deep intercessions.
3. What if you find yourself in a similar situation?
a. As difficult as it may seem, only the truth will set free. Without the truth, the freedom is doubtful.
b. Submit to your mentors. Go through the process. Don’t rush this.
c. There may be need to go for deliverance if there is any iota of truth to these things. Honestly. It sounds old fashioned, but if all the allegations are true, there are demonic holds that has to be broken. There is no area that is demonized as the area of sexuality.
d. Begin as a new believer. New creation realities. Renewal of mind. Be accountable. Be honest. Be open. When you hide transgressions, the Bible say you can’t prosper. The conscience has been seared, deception has come in, but in my little experience, God can only help when you are sincere. David said, search me and see… Read further in Psalm 51.
e. Crying alone is not enough. There is need for genuine repentance. Dislodging strongholds bent on staining the body of Christ and confronting stubborn spirits. There are twelve strongmen identified in the scriptures. Rape may look like a one time event, but the strongmen involved include strongman of perversion, strongman of deception and lies, the strongman of bondage and of course the strongman of heaviness which works more on the victim. As in the case of a leader or pastor, spirit of religion comes in as well as this is what can make a person stand behind the pulpit and still do such a thing. These spirits have to be dislodged!
4. For KHC Members and the Body of Christ
a. Don’t run your mouth.
b. Shut up and pray! Avoid gossip and banters.
Ephesians 5:4 (MSG)
Though some tongues just love the taste of gossip, Christians have better uses for language than that. Don’t talk dirty or silly. That kind of talk doesn’t fit our style. Thanksgiving is our dialect.
c. Don’t get bitter. Bitterness is an attempt to dislodge your faith and make you suffer. Be watchful. Don’t be victimized more than the victim!
d. Pray and pray. Intercede if you are truly concerned.
e. Learn from the experience. Never trust any Pastor. Avoid going to Pastor’s house alone. There are wolves in sheep’s clothing. There are false pastors. There are those whose mind are not yet renewed and yet are calling themselves Apostles.
f. If you are involved in any manipulation, oral sex, and so on with any “Pastor”, now is the time to break free.
g. Be wise. Read the Bible and study it. Stop looking for prophets. Stay in a local assembly and grow. And if the Pastor makes advances to you, don’t wait to prove it, run for your life.
h. Nobody will ever perform deliverance for you with sex. Think with your head. Never sleep on same bed with a pastor because you want to be obedient. Just be smart and run from such. Avoid private night vigils. Don’t meet a “man of God” in hotel or guest house? Whatever do you think you will be doing?
I’ve got to stop here. Will write more and break it down in the ensuing days. In the meantime, take some moments to pray!
Dunamis Tunde Okunowo
CONFESSION OF THE DAY
I have the fear of God. I am not deceived.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, deliver me from what is hiding to destroy me in Jesus name!
THOUGHT OF THE DAY
Proverbs 18:8 (MSG) Listening to gossip is like eating cheap candy; do you really want junk like that in your belly?
ACTION PLAN OF THE DAY
Take some time and intercede concerning these issues.
BIBLE READING OF THE DAY
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Husband of one. Father of Three. Mentor of thousands. Impact to nations. Addicted writer. Web Developer. Pastor at Shouts of Grace Center, Ibadan, Nigeria. Facilitator of Kisses and Huggs Club. Follow on Instagram HERE