Dear Lover, That Is Not The Way You Are

Dear Lover, That Is Not The Way You Are


Let’s talk to lovers this morning. I understand that there are temperaments and personalities and all of those. So a phlegamtic Bae would always expect that Boo should be able to read from her expressions that she is sad or angry with what he has done, and when Boo doesn’t seem to get the memo, Bae gets angry with Boo for not being able to “read the signs”.

What exactly am I saying this morning?

There was a time when the people of Israel were under serious Midianite oppression because they had disobeyed God by paying homage to the gods of the Amorites. Basically, God’s people had turned their backs against God and followed other gods.

So it was quite some fearful reign, full of tyranny and terror. It was in the midst of all of this that the Lord appeared to a man who was hiding stuff from the Midianites because he was so afraid of them. The man’s name was Gideon. Gideon was a man who didn’t look like courage.

For starters, a courageous person wouldn’t be hiding from people. So he lacked courage and to make things worse, he came from the weakest tribe in Israel at the time. But God told him he was a man of strength and that he was going to deliver the Israelites from the hands of the Midianites.

Gideon found this hilarious though. How could he, a coward, deliver the people of Israel from the Midianites?

But Gideon eventually rescued the Israelites from the Midianites. Gideon was saying he was a fearful, cowardly, weak man, but God made him see otherwise.

What is the point of this story (the story can be found in Judges 6)??

This is the point: Stop using the phrase, “that is the way I am” as an excuse to remain the way you are in your relationship with your partner.

I understand that there are temperaments and personalities and all of those. So a phlegamtic Bae would always expect that Boo should be able to read from her expressions that she is sad or angry with what he has done, and when Boo doesn’t seem to get the memo, Bae gets angry with Boo for not being able to “read the signs”.

And unnecessary issues start coming up, issues that could have been avoided if Bae had just simply verbally expressed her discomfort.

On the other hand, a choleric Boo would continue to say “this is the way I am”, when Bae complains that gets easily annoyed. And this goes on and on because Bae and Boo feel that is the way their personality is wired.
Well, that is a HUGE FAT LIE because you are born again, and you have the Holy Spirit who can help you with certain attitudes that are not godly.

If you really want your relationship to grow, you must begin to see yourself as a person who can be better with the help of the Holy Spirit. Stop seeing yourself as a person that has stopped evolving or transforming and can never change again.

You will even find out that your relationship will get a lot better if you and your partner are open to changing and evolving into better versions of yourself.

I mean, why remain at your 5.0 version when you can become your 9.0 version and even more?

May the Lord grant more understanding in Jesus name.

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I am not stagnant. I am constantly growing with the help of the Holy Spirit.

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Holy Spirit, help me to become a better person, help me to be constantly transformed by the renewing of my mind in Jesus name (Romans 12:1-2)

THOUGHT OF THE DAY
I can become a better version of myself with the help of the Holy Spirit.

ACTION PLAN OF THE DAY
Think about areas where you have felt you could do nothing about in your life and begin to ask the Holy Spirit to help you in each of those areas.

BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY
Judges 6


Pastor Dunamis Okunowo:
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Oshams Ebinum

I am Oshams, writer, blogger, soon-to-be author and Word-Lover.

This Post Has One Comment

  1. Jesupelumi

    I am not stagnant

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