What To Do When Your Spouse Is Not Appealing

What To Do When Your Spouse Is Not Appealing

We all change, our spouse will change. So does our taste, out look to life, career demands, our looks and generally many things about us.

So what do you do when you have changed and moved on and your spouse is a little laid back?

What of if the things you once permitted are now no more appealing to you?

What of if you have a more demanding schedule, you got a better job offer, your level in life changes and so you have to make certain changes to fit your new status and your spouse is not changing with you?

What do you do when it looks like your loved one is not meeting up with your change in status?

What if you become the CEO and your spouse still relates to you as though you are still an employee and doesn’t treat you as the boss?

What if your sense of fashion changes?

Well, every spouse should note that you have to change with your spouse.

You have to make yourself relevant in whatever ways your spouse deem fit.

Intellectually, academically, socially, spiritually and others.

I remembered when my husband did his Masters, I knew I have to do mine too.

Not out of competition but in a bid to remain intellectually relevant to him.

In the same way, we all should strive at remaining relevant to our spouse and whatever status they attain.

Example, If your husband becomes an Ambassador, you know you need to up your game.

You need to look more attractive, speak better, learn more about people skill and generally be a more informed person.

Most of what happens when your spouse attain certain heights is that you don’t climb the success ladder with him.

So he tries to look for some one, a friend to fit in.

I know faithfulness is one virtue we have to possess. That no matter what, our spouse remains our spouse.

But we can help reduce the amount of temptation by us doing what we should do.

Now, here a few tips that can help us remain relevant to our spouse at all times.

1. Recognize when the times are changing.

Failure to do this, is failure to prepare for the future with your spouse.

2. Know what type of changes is required of you.

Not just changing anyhow but making the changes relevant to meet our spouse’s need.

3. Surround yourself with friends and people that can help you positively.

Which ever area you are trying to grow or change, there are people that can help you achieve this.

4. Be willing to do whatever it may cost you.

Your spouse got a new job in another country, don’t be rigid.

You may have to follow him there and learn new ways of life.

5. The sacrifice will pay off later

Whatever sacrifices you did for your spouse will definitely pay off later.

It is better to sacrifice now and enjoy later.

When your spouse is becoming irrelevant to your life, it is a danger sign.

a. Share your thought about this lovingly to him/her.

b. Get a common mentor (someone he/she respects) speak to him/her.

c. Help him/her go the necessary helpful things.

d. Carry your spouse along, make sure your spouse is not too far from you. Let them be at your side

God bless your marriage

Confession of the day
I remain always , at all times, in all circumstances relevant to my spouse life

Thought of the day
Galatians 5:18 (MSG)  Why don’t you choose to be led by the Spirit and so escape the erratic compulsions of a law-dominated existence?

Prayer of the day
Lord help me to be always relevant to my spouse.

Action Plan
Find out ways you can be relevant to your spouse

Bible reading
John 8

Pastor Sophia Bola Okunowo

Sophia Bolanle Okunowo pastors alongside her husband at Shouts Of Grace Center in Ibadan. She is an administrator with a Health Provider company. She desires to see marriages blessed and fulfilling it's purpose.

This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Addey

    God bless you ma. This is really an important but subtle aspect of marriage. God help us remain relevant to our spouses. More Grace, ma.

    1. Pastor Sophia

      Amen. Yes, it is. The struve to remain relevant to our spouses must be an on going process.

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